Friday, June 12, 2009

Me and my bright ideas

So I am seriously thinking about re-inventing myself as I approach this, the 32nd year of my life. I was born and raised in Cali, have traveled throughout the US a bit, but really feel like there's nothing "here" for me. I live in a city about 60 miles outside of LA - which really isn't the problem. The problem is that even when I was in LA, I didn't like doing the typical "LA" things - club hopping, panty dropping, sippin' on gin and juice, etc. Just ain't me. I can count on one hand the number of dates I've had and the social life is really non existent.

I have a feeling if I remain here in my 1800 sq. ft, 3 bd 2bath house (that I share with a friggin' cat - no offense, Scottee), that my life is gonna pass me by and I will look up and be 40, still single, never been married, never dated, and regretting not getting the eff out of the city sooner.

So now I gotta make a choice - well, a myriad of choices (where, when and how being the primary ones) - and drown out a myriad of voices that will tell me I'm foolish to expect something different and to leave the comforts of familiarity. But to them, in advance, I'm preparing my rebuttals. This is a big world God made, who says we're "supposed" to only experience life in one zip code? I can easily stay in touch with my peeps via Facebook, the net, etc. I gotta change the game. I really feel that a move outside my comfort zone will help me grow as a person and challenge me in new ways. If I end up "hating" the new city, I can just go to another city. I'm child free, fancy free and have been living solo since college. If not now, when? I'm not at all afraid of change, I actually think it would be a bold, brazen, and beautiful adventure. Worst case scenario is that I will realize how good I have it (now) which will be "back then," and I can simply come back and set up shop here again. But the not knowing is driving me mad.

I want to meet people. I need a hug more often than 1x a month (and that usually in church when the pastor says hug your neighbor). I want to live a dream for a change, experience a different side of me, cultivate patience, throw caution to the wind, etc. I see myself all the better for it. Whether its 6 months away or 5 years, at least I can say, I ventured out, I tried something new and exciting. And by golly, I had a blast.

Me and my bright ideas...

1 comment:

eMCee said...

Wow, I spoke this into being 2 months before I was laid off and have been living abroad for over a year! Amazing!